Eyes Wide Open

My weekend went pretty well. Went to a party where there was no less than 100 people at any given time, food and drinks aplenty and I "heart" gay men. The crowd was fantastic, good mix of men, women, gay straight, you could in costume or without, the theme was "Isle of Whore". Fun, fun, fun.

I was going to write about what happened with a friend of mine this weekend, but then I got to work today and found an email in my inbox (as if you'd find them anywhere else) and it made my heart stop. It also made me say "holy shit", at least 3 times out loud.

A childhood friend of mine, who I found on myspace, after at least 15 years, and we've been emailing back and forth, hadn't heard from her in awhile. I'm rambling, sorry.

I get this email that says "sorry you've not heard from me, but the doctor's still don't know why I'm so tired and the cancer might be back." She's 31, with 4 children, a husband, a great job, etc, etc. My heart sunk. Her life was not easy, my mom and her mom were best friends, we lived right across the alleyway from each other, so we literally were in each other's backyards. Her mom died a month after her 31st birthday, my friend turns 31 soon, she hated her step-father and truth be told he was mean to her. I heard it, I saw it, so it's justifiable.

She moved out when she was 15, she made mistakes, she admits, but she also, as she says "came full circle and straighened her life out." And, she did, put herself through school, SMART girl, works for one of the largest banks in the nation as an accountant, married a great guy.

She forgave her step-father and they spent alot of time together before he died. She said the anger he had before was gone.

So, this, this is SO UNFAIR and what do you say? What do you say to someone who lost her mother at a very young age, she was 13 maybe a little younger, her only sister won't talk to her, her step-father who she made peace with is now dead too, she found her real father and realized he wasn't all that, and now...this.

My heart hurts for her, my whole body feels heavy. Because this, this is the type of person who deserves a BREAK, and I don't think people deserve anything, but this time, she deserves it.